Sunday, December 29, 2013

20 things to let go

Here are 20 things to let go of in order to reach unlimited happiness.
1. Let go of all thoughts that don't make you feel empowered and strong.
2. Let go of feeling guilty for doing what you truly want to do.
3. Let go of the fear of the unknown; take one small step and watch the path reveal itself.
4. Let go of regrets; at one point in your life, that “whatever” was exactly what you wanted.
5. Let go of worrying; worrying is like praying for what you don’t want.
6. Let go of blaming anyone for anything; be accountable for your own life. If you don’t like something, you have two choices, accept it or change it.
7. Let go of thinking you are damaged; you matter, and the world needs you just as you are.
8. Let go of thinking your dreams are not important; always follow your heart.
9. Let go of being the “go-to person” for everyone, all the time; stop blowing yourself off and take care of yourself first … because you matter.
10. Let go of thinking everyone else is happier, more successful or better off than you. You are right where you need to be. Your journey is unfolding perfectly for you.
11. Let go of thinking there's a right and wrong way to do things or to see the world. Enjoy the contrast and celebrate the diversity and richness of life.
12. Let go of cheating on your future with your past. It’s time to move on and tell a new story.
13. Let go of thinking you are not where you should be. You are right where you need to be to get to where you want to go, so start asking yourself where you want to go.
14. Let go of anger toward ex lovers and family. We all deserve happiness and love; just because it is over doesn’t mean the love was wrong.
15. Let go of the need to do more and be more; for today, you've done the best you can, and that's enough.
16. Let go of thinking you have to know how to make it happen; we learn the way on the way.
17. Let go of your money woes — make a plan to pay off debt and focus on your abundance.
18. Let go of trying to save or change people. Everyone has her own path, and the best thing you can do is work on yourself and stop focusing on others.
19. Let go of trying to fit in and be accepted by everyone. Your uniqueness is what makes you outstanding.
20. Let go of self-hate. You are not the shape of your body or the number on the scale. Who you are matters, and the world needs you as you are. Celebrate you!

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Thursday, December 05, 2013

My dreams is to...

Running around in Tarzan leave covered costume. Picking fruits for the next season.

I just realize one of my dream from Oh so long ago is to go west. 
Looking at the rate I'm moving now..... Is like not gg to happen...

Totally forgot abt questions to ask interviewer

How much is the rumberation?
How is the work week like?
What is the career path looks like?
How are the colleagues and bosses? People on the team?
Benefits for employees?

Monday, December 02, 2013

Time to clear up

Losing track of life whenever there's shoot...

A major decision was made, I'm relief for the first time in a yr. So happy yet uneasy.

I need sometime to sort my things out in my room, in my resume, in my head. Maybe all I get is 2 days off.

I need to let go of the people, the hatred I have for them, because after all no one cares abt your existence there.

Ohh 100th monthsary N christmas is coming! 

Can I really try to wrap myself up for you?


The kind of job I want

- government civilians
- adequate family annual medical leaves
- good boss
- helpful colleagues
- place for growth and learning
- gives adequate salary
- good environment 
- a great mentor 

Ok la 8 points to check when looking for job.. Fingers crossed to get it! Great way to start new year!

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

从心重新

曼谷回来,还是心烦意乱。好像比之前更遭。
因为回来要面对更多的事。
更多个对不起要说。
要紧牙根,为了找回自己,更自私些,什么都别想,就这样做我该做的事。

一切都会随时间逝失。
要放下的:

尊严
过去
批评
自我
成绩
要求

受伤了
还是要走

难怪梦里要点一根香都那么难。



Wednesday, November 06, 2013

NC 16 not for baby post

Now I know why the FUCK they keep telling me to be humble. CCB




Job

I need to constantly remind myself that this is just a temp job.

Until I get another one.

Friday, October 25, 2013

选路13-10-13

选这条路的我们,必定孤独。
我们选错吗?

恩人

郭靖凌老师

6年前,毕业后彷徨无助,在寻找事业目标方向,踏入社会前,与郭老师见面。当时找他吃饭,前提请他替我写张推荐信,还记得是在j8的Thai express.

他赐我一句:
“人生中发生的事,是为未来做最好的准备”

今天再重逢,在学院遇见随口说吃饭,其实也是想请他指点迷津。迷茫了一年半载,终于有了答案。

听见自己的学生和他一样拿了long service award,他欣慰呵呵笑。

他也像当年一样滔滔不绝说了很多。感觉没变。说着说着,字字一针见血,像是把我憋了几个月的苦都分析出答案。我问的问题他都能开解我。仿佛把我心中的瓶颈,掀开瓶盖,霉气晦气喷出来。即使眼泪和当时一样一直不停地在眼里打转,我还是摆出一本正经样跟他猛点头,像足刚当年的学生。

他没教过我,可却是我毕业后最好的老师。很庆幸他教给我的都是课堂上,不可能碰到的人生大道理。

两杯天与地绿茶6.20 Burger King做了1小时,还真的值回本。

这次他赐我,大意跟前一个一样:“ 做凡事都有意义。”

他劝我耐心,把自己当作学习中的画家,吸取经验,任何经验都好,这样有一天就能打造自己的一种风格,

我很感激,很感动,也很感谢。这种机遇真的是可遇不可求。

Stephen Sheppard 
大师班老师,美国新闻导播,资深传媒人。

他看中我,可能我的发型亮眼容易记。上课第一个记得的就是我的名Jing。之后偷瞄了他的笔记,在我名字旁写了blonde,我偷笑。我的确是班上唯一染金发的学生。
他把我归入杂队。对我说:im sure jing's flexible she can handle anything.

队伍里每个人的目的不同,背景更乱。比DAS 更乱。大家都很有热忱学习。可是拍完我要拍的东西后,剪出来的东西却失去先前打算做的主题。很懊恼,怎么大家能够接受这种做法。我是不是应该学着去接受?
总之,我私下找他聊我的看法,他鼓励我,去新闻组深一层探讨实事,敢于出众,下令我下星期一找实事的导播聊聊。临走前,熊抱我好一下。感觉真的很棒。像是电影中的老爸一样,只不过他很高像只巨熊。

一个不认识我的人,相信我能够在实事组工作,我怎么不相信我自己呢?

惭愧,同时感激,感动。

某年长者专家在接受访问后,得知我是媒体人,对我说:I've always supported the media, because media is such a powerful medium. You guys are powerful.

我知道自己写的东西,制作的作品都很可能影响一个人的思想。我觉得我要净化每个人是不可能的。但是我能把我认为对的传下去。其中就是华人思想,哲学,文化。

打造属于新加坡自己的节目,然国外人抄袭我们。

忽然好热血哦。



Sunday, October 13, 2013

Cheating agenda

I can't say I hate him for what he does. I'm disappointed because he is going through something that I've gone through before but much worse. With more stakes at hand.

I know why I did it before and I have accepted it as my past and now I don't do it because there's no need for it.

I'm disappointed that he doesn't do what he preach. I'm disappointed that he doesn't see a potential husband in my friend.

I'm sad because I can't help both of them. I want to tell him what he did is absolutely temp pleasure, he is playing with his potential future. 

I want to tell him give the guy a second chance, you might end up with a more loving husband than anyone else.. Some ppl just need to grow up to know that. But I'm afraid of betrayal again.

I truly want them to be happy and loving together but it is sad when facing w a breakup. 

我只希望爱我和我爱的人都能幸福快乐。




Thursday, October 10, 2013

老子的智慧

心要静
道德经
才能进



法国作家巴尔扎克说:自满、自高自大和轻信是人生的三大暗礁。

Monday, October 07, 2013

back on crossroad once again

SO crazyyyy!!!!
i have viewers from all over the world!

Pageviews by Countries

Graph of most popular countries among blog viewers
EntryPageviews
Singapore
1384
United States
51
Germany
24
China
22
Russia
15
Israel
12
Netherlands
12
France
7
Ukraine
7
Latvia
6



SOoooo awesome! can i just die now?

was feeling rather down today when i look at jobstreet and realised there's absolutely NOTHING i wanna do... i cant picture myself doing anything... working for other ppl.. or even being my own boss..

it's like a blackout period for me... will this ever end? or will i keep wondering what's the best job for me?

i look back at my old entries which always makes me smile.. it's like talking to your younger self and wishing you could reply and say " look at me now, i've come this far".

Then where shld I go next? 

...

Hahaha


Sunday, October 06, 2013

看清

我不能临阵退缩。
这一切所发生的事,尤其是J导是上天派来考验我的人。
教我不能看扁任何人。
我一直想办法改掉这个“看扁人”的想法。
像藏在基因里天生就喜欢瞧不起人。
我要学会消化
“世界上没有任何人比谁强,大家都是平等”的观念。
这两天满脑子里想的是怎么准备下一餐,怎么喂饱肚子。
不愁别的。
突然眼前一亮,什么都清楚了。以前平困的日子也是烦三餐,有钱花就够了。现在一点小事就发牢骚,喊命苦。真是不应该。
GM diet不只清理肠胃系统也给身心带来不一样的解脱。
真是舒服啊!


Sunday, September 29, 2013

Random thoughts on life

Life is a road of self discovery...
If we can place ourselves as an observer in every situation,we would see things more clearly and not be affected by the situation. After all, it doesn't matter, time will put it aside, we all will die one day. How are you like as person? What you did when you're living, only matters at that moment in time. Our story dies when people around us dies. Nothing is kept eternally. Nothing is eternal. 

Life only matters to you. It is how we (our emotions) make sense of the world. Laws and rules kept us from destroying ourselves and the others. At the end of life, do we still stood up and say I disagree with the law and the norms of people? No.. We will just suffer alone and quietly die in peace.. People around us will cry but we hear nothing. We feel nothing. We see nothing. Do we still see any future in that? Maybe, that will be told in another life time. 


Sunday, September 08, 2013

If I can, I would..

-Learn Kung fu
-Learn boxing and hit the ring whenever I am angry
-Jam the drums and play the drummer really loud in the middle of the night
-dress gothic and walk around with spikes and thorns scaring people with pierced tongues and nose rings
-walks around with a bottle of beer everywhere drunkard.
-dance around the campfire blindfolded
-have a nice body to swim naked in the swimming pool 
-jog in the rain 
-run up to a stranger to give her a hug
-clean up a rhino/hippo's poo
-jump on bed and play pillow fights with my baby
-play paintball
-play air gun
-play darts
-ride horses and gallops away!!!!
-play food fight!!!
-walk a princess down the stairway
-bring my family to live in A big villa in Florida

Friday, September 06, 2013

要完了要完了要完了!
Yes!!!! 
心情越来越开心
感觉越来越好、世界变得越来越好

Wednesday, September 04, 2013

Every thing is telling me to close my heart and open when necessary 

Friday, August 30, 2013

我对DAS2的不满

1)工作时间明显拉长,两个导播时间的控制、事情处理方式、完全不一样。我认为导播应该一直而且一致的重复考虑当初所定下的agenda. 考虑大环境对这部戏的观点,在同时考虑镜头美感。

2)内容应该是随机应变,可是现在却成了戏剧。

3)要3架机做什么!?

4)人选对语言掌握大大影响制作。

如果是我拍,我一定会让观众看到艺人和制作组的互动。多加点running man的拍摄作风。观众是聪明的,不会因为你的偷拍让他觉得自己在偷窥。偷窥我只能说用法适量就好,根本无须每个镜头都这样做


Tuesday, August 06, 2013

Up down uppp downn

1 more day to work.
3 hrs to settle email.
Rest of the day to rush DAS
Final hr to chillax 
Then here comes the holiday!
And the waking up at 5am....
Then comes the non stop filming! 


I dunno which one i look forward to....

Monday, August 05, 2013

Friday, August 02, 2013

A new journey has begun!

Last night i dreamt that People who maligned me, who scolded me for nothing came to apologize.. I felt So good... This evening Suzie officially handover my job scope for me! 

I'm free!!! Finally!! I can breathe, sleep, eat like normal again! This time with better and happier people around me! 

Couldn't ask for more! 

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Lalalala July finally ended!!!

So tired 
So tired
So tired
So tired 
So tired of all these chasing... 
Mentally draining me away...
I can feel the stress accumulating in my body esp my upper back spine... It's hurting. My body needs to completely relax and let go of all these job nonsense.

To handle two sides of the job is physically tiring. One is something that I like and look forward to. You see a system in doing things. You see schedules and deadlines and people's response were nice and kind.

The other is just pure bullshit. Blames and backstabbing, people turn away, disappointment and failure to deliver. It's somewhere I want to leave so badly but I have to hang in there until my part is done. It's not until mid aug... I'm sure it's not until my holiday starts hahaha! Then im gg full force for the filming! 

I think I need to give myself a time to break off from all these.. Tml is 1 aug! I'm so glad so glad July has ended!!!

New look and I'm lovingg it! Even
Suzie says so hahah!

Thursday, July 25, 2013

3 pieces of advices

1) it is only as impt as you think it is
2) sometimes you have to bend backwards in order to go forward like a rubber band
3) whatever people say abt you is none of your business.


From Terence.
I just wanna cry right now

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Things I learn from LOL

1) work is definitely not play; play can never be work when it is a talkshow

2) planning does not equate to actual execution

3) watch your body language and your attitude especially to external parties be it audience or guest.

4) people who take pix with you does not equate to them interested in you

5) when it is not a big deal don't make a mountain out of a molehill.

6) when people complain you don't need to act upon it immediately.

Monday, July 08, 2013

Tv hides reality. 

Monday, July 01, 2013

Why am I so sad?

Why?
Becos something I remind someone to do over the past 3 months was thrown back to me. And when I voice out, they take it as nothing, scolded me back for my rudeness.

Why? 
She puts on a fake mask doesn't do work and still earns more than me.

Why?
She can boss people around and no one gives a damn?

Why? 
When we do something that's right and Yet get punished by people that doesn't do anything?

Why? 
No one recognizes my effort, No one is helping, no one is guiding me where to go?

I want to be stronger. Emotionally I feel that I grew stronger. But I can feel my body wore out bit by bit.. It is a tough job.. A job for 3.. I'm handling all.. It's not even rewarding.. 

I want to leave commissioning.. I want to do something else.. From the looks of it.. It ain't gg anywhere till next yr.. I'm tired I'm sick.. 

I just want to get away.. 

Help... ?

Saturday, June 29, 2013

7月

是我不熟练
不懂得处理人际关系
才造成这些不必要的压力吗?

一人兼多职
真的很累
他妈的累

每天都不想去想工作
谈到工作更是可怕

不懂未来的去向
也不懂现在的逆境会维持多久

每天上班就像上战场
比在iw更辛苦

幸好能准时下班
不然真的很累
工作也不必带回家
周末和放工后都能好好休息

他们说最迟也要明年拍完手上所有的戏才能换工作。想拍戏?等咯。

7月诸事多
更动也多

换老板
学法语
生日会
现场戏
见面会

可能只是心病吧

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Discrimination


I'm discriminated by people around me whenever I behave like a boy.

When I cut my hair short..
The designer next to me literally scream omg you skinned your hair!!! I can actually see your skin!!!

When my boss sees it he smile and say don't cut so short.. Not good.. I ask why not.. He just smile..

When a lesbian friend sees it she says

Why ah? 
Why must I answer to all of you?
Why must you define how I look like or what I do?

Just because my gf is butcher than me I need to conform Norms and act as a femme?

I need to change my sex to be beside her issit? 
Or do I need to change gf to someone else girly so that I can be myself?

I just. Kept quiet. Because you will never know how much I hate you for this.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

金钱论

不知曾几何时
无论价钱
每一餐都讲究味道好

无论价钱
只要达到目的
多少钱我都能给

不知什么时候
我变成那么一个会鄙视金钱的人

"少了这份工作,我就变回普通人"
这句话 原来很多人时时刻刻都在自问。

昨天到餐厅吃饭
两人只叫了一人份
花不到20元
内心顿时挣扎一下
"走进餐馆,花那么少,会不会被瞧不起?"

懒得理,拍拍屁股走了。

日后应该还有更多这类事会发生,不过钱这回用起来比较实际吧。

在城市里工作真的会害死一个人。
我要逃离这里。
真的很想。

Donation

Everyone came here for a purpose. I think I found mine. Thanks for giving me a purpose in life!



Tuesday, June 04, 2013

忽然觉得

不想睡觉的原因
是不想度过这难得的夜晚。

好不容易等到傍晚,不想那么快度完。

我好懒噢〜

Learning French

I really think that life has more to offer than at work... So picking up my French from where I've stop would definitely harness my potential of becoming a creative person. 

I love the culture.. I love how romantic they are.. I love how inspiring they are. There is simply no reason NOT to learn their language! 

I'm sure once I master French I'm able to watch all my French movies without subtitles and even write a French love letter to lovely hahaha!

What really excites me.. Is.. You won't believe it...

Taking the French exam hahahaha

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

寻寻觅觅寻寻
凄凄惨惨凄凄

现在很想骂     
他妈的!

I'm back at the crossroad once again.. Where shld I go? 
Left right.. Up down.. 

It's a never ending decision.... Maybe because I don't have a goal.. Everything is blurred and uncertain.. My goal is to be a producer/director where I can produce my own show... 

I want to do shows that is of high value. I want to do shows that people will watch and gain knowledge from.. 

My first intuition is to follow su...

Monday, May 27, 2013

Learn to..

I shld learn to read between the lines when my baby is upset/quiet and use abit more effort to understand you better so as to make the best decision. If not we'll miss a great deal of fun together. 

I really love you baby and I nv want to see you sad..

Friday, May 24, 2013

A little love note

She never stopped loving me.

Why shld I stop loving her? 


_Lovely

Me and you and a dog named boo

Wednesday, May 08, 2013

Then I realized

It's all the memories that made up good times...

I wanna go to a place where the tree I planted grow

Tuesday, May 07, 2013

Everyday from now

I woke up before alarm rang, made myself breakfast n lunch, went to work,took a bus, did my job, watch 1/2 of crazy stupid love movie until boss comes, look for the right person, finished my job, ended work early to fetch my grandma, took cab home, ask abt my sister's day, fetch grandma, took Panadol and a nap, woke up to cook dinner for my family, clean the kitchen, kept some for gf, mop the floor, wash the dishes, sat and watch TV w gf, see gf off, take a bathe, surf net, watch one piece, go back to bed.

Every day's the same ...... Yet with Little bits of happiness :D

Saturday, May 04, 2013

Post bday message

I'm having fun!!
Can I continue staying here pls? I keep Asking myself... Did I make full use of it? Was it worthwhile?

Then I realise I shldnt be worried abt this at all... I had the best dinner best time w my family.. what more can I ask for...

I am happy on my bday! Now can I have some mushroom soup pls!

Thursday, May 02, 2013

All that I can think of

Is
One piece puru puru speaker
my rendezvous hotel
The straits cafe
My tunlips on the bay
adventure cove
Stomp
Bk Breakfast

Enough to keep me happy all day!

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Birthday

This yr I didn't talk much abt it.. But I'm secretly looking forward to it. I think all Taurus are the same... Haahaa

I'm really happy su's bday is 4 days before mine :)
The company is celebrating for her, I get to pretend its mine too... Shh

I'm also looking forward bcos someone bought me something Tt I like!

So happy!

Saturday, April 27, 2013

人生在不同阶段,所得到的领悟大有不同。
领悟,不是做完某件事得到的后感;更不是瞑坐得到的启发。
领悟,是碰一声得到的突发奇想;领悟,是一瞬间闪过的念头。
有时候它就这样钻进脑子里,小朋友突然变成熟了。少年突然得志。老头突然想开。
我喜欢这样的突然,我喜欢这样的随性。
漫长人生,如果天天都有所领悟,人类会不会变得更好?

爸妈最近一直在问,毕业了要干什么?
要学什么?进修什么?

好像有一辈子读不完的书,学不完的东西在等着我。突然感到无奈,学了那么多最后变得怎么样?还不就是死在沙滩上?

我的学术能改变世界吗?能在历史上留下灿烂的光辉吗?

选择这行,目的就是在给自己留下毕生难忘,人人皆知的作品。
自己要如何达到这个目标,让世人记得你?

我可没九把刀那么想征服全世界,我只想让世界知道,我杨景羡,是个了不起的人。

会太扯吗?

Friday, April 26, 2013

Recycle your brain

i look back in life and saw what I have become.

I used to think that i know it all.

Then I realise it's better to be ignorant.

I used to believe in friends and trust everyone.

Then I got hurt and hide myself.

I used to think that I'm the ugliest person in the world.

Then I grew fat. And instead I look better.

I used to be insecure and looks for company and fun at every corner.

Then I grew older and view things in a different perspective.

Topics discussed grew thinner with strangers.

I used to chat 5-8 ppl on irc. Now it's just me and you.

Over thinking will destroy your brain. It just destroyed mine.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

I just wanna bite you

Thursday, April 11, 2013

My rotten ex boss

Everytime I talk abt Jackie I'll feel that lump in my throat and my eyes starts to well up with tears.

I dunno what is it that brought these tears.
Did I fail him as a writer? My work is not recognize, i feel invisible in the department.

Name one thing he has does to disappoint you.
His reaction when I ask to stay for a bit longer to make it for the yr end bonus. and him make me leave within a month to make way for his new writer.

His allocation of points were always 2/5 for me out of 5 yrs I've gotten 2, 3, 4,2, 2.

I've handled very bad bosses before, worse office colleagues and politics. I'm actually used to his torments haha.

He is really a bad and selfish person. And I'm tired of growing under a rotten log.
Please let me grow in sunshine soon...

Monday, April 08, 2013

Things will get better.

Thursday, April 04, 2013

2nd month

This is my 2nd month with TOGGLE, yet it feels like decades already. Everyday I get N numbers of crisis. People who plays tai chi.. People who throw temper.. People who cc the world.. People who does things "accidentally" to get people in trouble.. I feel that I've save the team from quite a few big crisis.. And I deserve some credit for that.. Bosses are nice to me..

But I'm feel that this job is not cut out for me. I m meant for bigger things!!!!

I've been telling myself just come here learn the ropes and u can go off to be a successful person somewhere else.. But my instinct is telling me to stay.. Somewhere there I smell opportunity..
I need to consistantly remind myself that The job I'm doing is just a training ground.

That's what I've been telling myself in when i was in Iweekly hahaa.. Look where i end up.. Hmm.. Time is running out.. I'm already 25 how the hell am I going to prepare for what is install for me?

Who ask me to choose entertainment lifestyle. Go be engineer or scientist or banker la.. Earn big bucks... :(

Can I pls pls pls meet a brilliant trustworthy investor that can help me make alot of money?


Feel like reading little prince tonight.... Something inspirational.. Time to visit the library soon!

Friday, March 22, 2013

With love from friends

I was lost.
I dug through pain memories, empty dreams, disillusioned scenes to find a life I'm looking for.
I misled myself into thinking happiness in life is where one party all night long surrounded with friends feeling high and dead drunk.
I think that to have girls wanting to spend the night with you is flattering and successful.
I feel that life shld be more than just spending it with love ones.
I shld do what I like and be what I want to be.

How wildful is that?

I spend the week putting myself out there. Doing things that I tot would make me happy. Drinking alcohol and partying all night. But after the alcohol effect was gone everything all back in place. I'm still lonely and upset.

Lynette/Marc cherry said: we always forget, that hole in the heart is already filled.

I have forgotten how happy I was before this tide hit me. I was strong healthy and filled with love from my family and friends.

Friends that know me. Friends that I have known for more than 10 yrs. friends that truly care. You can't fake a relationship like that. You can't start a new relationship with someone and expect them to know you. It takes time to build up the trust and understanding. Friends that click and friends that truly know what you need.

We may have our different directions in life but they have accepted who I am. They don't judge and they value who you are.

These are friends that will last. I'm really thankful that they came along tonight.

Tuesday, March 05, 2013

Will there be a mad hatter tea party? Will anyone wants to drink tea with me if you're not around?


I'm friendly and I'm friendless hahahaha...

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Helpless

When u can't do anything about the current situation.
When you desperately wants to go back to your old routine.
When you just want to do what your heart and brain tells you to.

But the hurdle is there. The freaking caution sign is there. Consequences that needs careful consideration. Or else all the effort will go into waste.

It's just not shiok enough when you have to be wearing the caution tag everywhere you go!

Please heal quickly please... I need to move on already!!!!

Thursday, January 24, 2013

扭到

好久好久没扭伤脚了
辛苦的,不是那只受了伤的脚,而是另一只脚。不方便的,是其他部位的不方便而不是那只脚。

好像每一次认真运动减肥的时候都会发生一些小意外,让人不得已在家休养。
修养的定义就等于>变肥


Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Someone ask me. Why are You stuck with one person for 7 year? By the time she leave you, you'll be so old no one will want you already.

I say I never mind lor at least someone really want me before.
At least I can say I have a real relationship before.
At least i can count on her when I'm depressed. She will always make me smile. No one else can.
At least I loved someone in this life.
I can proudly say I can die with no regrets because Our love made an impact in our lifetime.

And i turn and walk away from that someone.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The more it draws to a close the more stress I get.

Insomnia. I'll get over it. Needa run.

Too much chicken too much crap. Get a life girl. Eat clean train hard lose weight!

Sunday, January 20, 2013

下了一整晚的雨终于停了。
2013年第一次熬夜,忙着整理照片。手上只有06-13年的照,之前的完全不了了之。原来我中学没拍过什么照。可能太丑了,相机会坏掉吧。可能是发育时期,荷尔蒙失调把照片全删了。
少了照片,心里难免失落,好像有一部分的人生完全失去踪影。
很黑暗,很痛苦的记忆。开始了解人生,却遭现实逼上绝路的时候。
少了那段记忆,我的人生拼凑起来还算幸福。嗯,照片中的我们永远那么开心。难道说明照片里有很多假象?
也未必。人生嘛,看你怎么对待咯,真真假假,何必那么执着?
忽然有种念头,其实照片不是不小心弄不见,可能命中注定要我忘记的?

Tuesday, January 01, 2013

20 RESOLUTION 13

1) reach 55kg by next yr
2) learn to use design program
3) achieve a fitness award/cert
4) go for cooking/photography class
5) start investing on stock market/unit trust
6) bring Cashy for a run every weekend